Early Morning Recollections

I have had to keep reminding myself that I am in Colombia, SA.  I woke up this morning with that “where am I” vacation hotel syndrome.  Where you wake up and your brain has to recalibrate and remember where you are.  The most refreshing aspect of that though is that it wasn’t cause by an alcohol-induced hangover as in many, many years past.  It was simply that I’d had one, long, amazing day yesterday and I was exhausted.  God reminded me of my crazy 20’s when I would repeated nights of alcohol or partying and I would roll out of bed for work, only to press repeat when I clocked out.  God also reminded me that the only break I ever had from the mayhem back then was when I slept.  5-8 hours every day I was free from the façade that my life had become.  I compared that with the last few years of my life, where it has been hard to get any sleep at all.  I have by no means arrived at complete and utter freedom as the world defines it my friends, but as I shared last night with the congregation of Ed’s church, I realized I am finally comfortable in my skin.  And Jesus is the only reason I got here.  I wrote a poem once that talked about looking for myself in the eyes of every man that passed by.  In a sense that is what life was like for me for so long.  A desperate search for value conducted in the eyes of men.  Jesus is the only one man that will love you as deeply as you need to be loved.  Stop searching in the valley of the lost my friends.  Spend a few moments, or longer, this morning at your bedside or in a quiet place and admit as I did so long ago, “I’m tired and I need a rest that fulfills and quenches this eternal exhaustion.  Jesus give me rest in your arms.  Help me search Your heart and mind for the rest of me. ”  Stop striving little brothers.  Stop striving to be so much for everyone else or striving to achieve greatness and slow your life down long enough to catch a glimpse of the Heart of God for your life.  It took me years to say “ENOUGH!” and when I did, I wished I had said it sooner.  God loves you, warts and all.  Jesus is extending his hand of mercy.  As Sheila Walsh once said, “You have never lived an unloved moment in your life.”  Let God show you love today as you prepare to press that repeat button on your life.  Get off your phone.  Get out of your house.  Answer the call of God that has been ringing in your head for years.  All my best.  May God bless your efforts.